My heart is so heavy, I feel deeply in my soul for others and for that I am grateful. Many have told me I am too sensitive, or sorrowful. I beleive God has given me a heart of compassion for a reason. The things I have gone thru in my life pale in comparrison to what so many other have faced or have to face. How do we go on day to day fully aware of what is happening in the world and continue to complain about the small problems in our own lives? Bitching about work, cars, phones, the person next to us, etc. UGGH!! I guess we know nothing better, I am just as guilty as the next guy. It is sad though, these types of things should put it into perspective for us. Though often they do, but that perspective is lost after a month or so. As I watch the coverage of the earthquake in Haiti I am angered and saddend that I do not have the means to help. I being only one person with no skill in First aid what could I do anyways? I have two arms,two legs, two eyes and good health so I know I could help somehow!!! Arent we supposed to help our fellow man? Why do so many with the means turn a blind eye? How do we see our brothers and sisters in Christ suffer and do nothing? Or we help and once those have the same problems again say well I tried to help, The bible never said to stop helping, to give up, to decide you have done enough, did it? Maybe? I know my Bible, but not back and forth. I do not know enough that is for sure, so maybe I am wrong? I admit I have been this person in helping a certain family in my life and I actually realize this very moment I am carrying great shame for allowing myself to say I cant help them anymore because they can not help themselves. At this moment however....I am told to turn off the news, stop dwelling on it, you have a family to support you need to worry about them and not stuff you cant do anything about, etc. I find those words to be so ignorant. My heart aches for people in pain. The small pains I have gone through losing my sister are HUGE in my life! It put me in the perspective of being greatful for each day and each moment with loved ones, it changed my life forever. I can not imagine how people go on after losing their children,wives,husbands,parents or entire families in these types of tradgedies ! This happens often and I think back to previous tradgedies that many forget after the news coverage ends..Earthquakes,Floods,Tsunamis..Peru,China,Thailand,New Orleans,911, Iowa... there are soo many!! I understand its part of life and its bound to happen btu I still cant make sense of it, and maybe we are not supposed to. Maybe it is crazy to think, I, one working mother of 4 in Mesa Arizona, surving paycheck to paycheck, can help anyone, or do anything to help. But I would like to think I can. I would like to think someone like me would want to help my family in the same situation, even just to hear me cry, hug me, pray for me. If I had the means, I like to think I would. For now, all I can do is pray for all the people of the world who have lived through such terror and tradgedy. And remind myself EVERYDAY that I have it easy,my pains are small in comparison, and help those around me with what I have to offer.
2 comments:
I like your honesty. I think I've felt more disconnected from this disaster than some of the others, but then I get a little down on myself for not being more 'interested' in what's going on there. This is so huge, and you're right... it's our job as the body of Christ to respond with compassion.
You know lately I have been feeling the same way. I need to help but don't know how but when someone suggests a way I shy away from it. Why? Should I be picky about the way I help others? I shouldn't right? It shouldn't matter as long as I get to do it. Then there are some cases where you can't help and that just breaks my heart. Reading about those lives and other lives I find myself everyday so grateful for what I have, a roof over my head, friend to count on and a beautiful family! Glad I am not the only one who feel this way.
Post a Comment